I am Legend opens today. Redneck Reality Check

December 14, 2007

Will Smith must be in heaven, With all them big ole Buck Deer running around there, Now thats a Rednecks Paradise, I remember in school when all the girls you used to say, “Not if you were the last guy on earth” Well here the Fresh Prince is the last one one earth, well at least in NYC.

Smith is Robert Neville. The cover of Time on his fridge door pictures a “Soldier. Scientist. Savior?” but that hanging question mark is well chosen, and we divine that his immunity is pure chance.

He’s not quite alone. Neville patrols Fifth Avenue in his Mustang with Sam, a German Shepherd (also immune to the airborne virus), broadcasting into the void, then returning home to his Washington Square townhouse to put up the shutters before nightfall.

That’s when the “Dark Seekers” venture out: feral, contaminated people with a rabid appetite for flesh but no pupil dilation reflex to protect them against sunlight.

Now I don’t know about ya’ll But if I was the last man in NYC, I wouldn’t be running around in no little girly mustang, I would have myself a big ole ford duely so if one of them critters get in my way I wont have to worry bout shootin them, I would just run their little running asses over. That’s what make TV so much different than real life, He is driving a car, He did steal anything, and he has a goofy little gun he is going to try to protect him and his cute little puppy with.

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